Silver for Ping Pong

Bismillah, Assalamualaikum :)

Alhamdulillah, yey! another silver for ping pong and i gotta really must most definitely LEARN AND ACQUIRE the skill to smash! so beware to my opponents, i'm still learning to be the best!

nanti aku bg bola skrew, bole twist, bola potong, bola smash, ape lagi bola, hehe :p

ME debating in BM

Bismillah, Assalamualaikum :)

It’s astonishing that I can’t really speak fluently in Bahasa Malaysia but joining the debate competition in BM proves that I can actually make a fool of myself speaking BM and that I better brush up on my BM as it is the national language.

Firstly, because I am a JMK, I was only supposed to be a work force behind the Debat Piala Naib Canselor but due to a vacancy of one debate group in my college, the debate club had to find a swing team ASAP. And that’s when they started asking random people since most of the talented students were not around. And so they asked me. Hahaha, it seems funny to look back at all that has happened now because my roommate agreed to be in it since a swing team is confirmed to lose in the first round as it is only for the purpose of making the numbers of debate teams that are competing even. My roommate has experience debating in the Bahasa Malaysia so I figured she would just do it for kicks since there was no expectation in winning. However, a third speaker was not to be found and my roommate drags me in saying that with practise, maybe I could do it. And I actually DARED to believe that I could! It’s amazing I could even think like that because these sequences of events all happened on the night before the competition.

Tak pasal-pasal I had to sleep late that night because they wanted to see if I could speak when becoming a third speaker for my debate team. And then they asked if our team could change to not being the swing team but a REAL team, the KZ 3. I became really anxious and started to chicken out. Since it was practise time that night, I demanded to be out and admitted defeat even though I haven’t even started to speak yet. I was totally freaked out! Did they really think that they could change me into being an overnight BM debater?! It made me laugh nervously but apparently they wanted to try since they were desperate. It makes me amazed that even though these debaters had to practice and write down so many notes, they still stole some time to help and teach me! Alhamdulillah, I am so grateful at their endeavour in at least wanting me to achieve something.

But I was not AT ALL confident! That morning, I woke up and called many people to replace me but no one came to my aid. I felt so helpless and gloomy that morning but because I had an obligation to fulfil, I didn’t have the heart to back out and proceeded to my first debate competition.

I am not good in debating, even in the English language. It seems that I just don’t have the knack when it comes to fighting facts using very effusive language. I do want to learn though but I’m not really inclined towards the Malay language. But it seems that I can’t really run from something I’m afraid of and the whole event proves it.

There were 10 teams and 4 matches. My team has a reserve so I debated in 3 matches while the reserve debated in only 1. That’s because he’s just as bad as me but he couldn’t finished the 7 minutes allocated for each debater whereas I spoke so s l o w that I even exceeded 7 minutes, hahaha! I sure did embarrassed myself! There was 1 match whereby I wanted to translate facilities and what came out was facilitators but I didn’t notice and just went on talking faking confidence. I didn’t even notice everyone was laughing! When they told me, I laughed so hard that my stomach hurts!

3 aspects were considered in the debate competition, style, language and content. I have the content because my 1^st speaker was the best! She helped me a lot and so I prayed that she gets the best speaker every time and she attained the best speaker for 5 consecutive matches! I pity that she had to put up with me, hehehe :p

I do not have such effusive Malay language to match with my opponents. Most people find it hard to translate Malay into English but I do the opposite! I translated English words into Malay and people end up getting confused and laughing at my attempt, sabar jela :p

Besides that, I am not at all cynical and sarcastic and I even smiled at the other team making my first speaker and my second speaker (my roommate) exasperated. Hahaha, I can’t help it! I felt ever so foolish speaking with words all jumbled up and killing for time going all uhm, ahhh, uhm, ahh :p

So we didn’t want to win and had no expectations of winning whatsoever BUT we won one match out of the four. This is because (obviously I didn’t contribute anything at all) the team that we went against were also newbie and they had insufficient points to fight against ours. Out of 10 teams, we were ranked no8 and SURPRISINGLY we got into the quarter finals! [I’m grinning because it really is unbelievable!]

Well, we lost in the quarter finals to the no 1 team! But we gave them a good fight (I don’t think I did though, what a laugh!). In the beginning, I was so intimidated to go against the no 1 team! I tried to back out persisting my reserve to fill in for me but they said I was improving and that I could do it. Well, I did badly, looking down at the papers most of the time getting all clammy and with knots in my tummy and smiling (my roommate geram je tengok!).

“Pembangkang yang comel molek itu harus dibuang keluar dewan kerana tidak pandai hendak membidas!”

Said the first speaker (who got best speaker for 4 matches) in a jokingly manner. His team got into the finals.

All in all, I had a valuable experience and in between 3 important assignments, I actually managed to push myself to the limit, sleeping late until 3am in the night and waking up early. It’s not that admirable but at least I can say I achieved a lot in my university years and that I actually won one match in a BM debate, hehe :p

Hail to the New Shah Alam!

Bismillah, Assalamualaikum :)

So I have been itching all along to write about politics and of the recent General Election that happened on the 8^th March 2008 but couldn’t find the time and a speedy wireless connection to do so. Furthermore, I have been too bogged down with academic plus non-academic work that I feel exhausted [and all the synonyms of this word].

I wasn’t even there on the 8^th March because I was on the way to Johore for my cousin’s traditional wedding in Kempas. But I followed the news intently and not just the news from the TV and radios but also the informal updates I get from my friends and my family who got it from their friends, hehe :p

I am not fanatic about politics and I detest that politics in Malaysia is dirty and purportedly democratic when in fact, that’s not really the case. As it is so obvious which political party hogs the mass media, hmm…

But politics is a part of Islam therefore I cannot turn a blind eye and put on a deaf ear to what’s happening in this country regardless of the mud and the dirt that’s already there. And I’m happy with the results of the election because I feel that

IT IS TIME FOR CHANGE!

Malaysia should wake up because the majority of us take things too much for granted and eat too much santan and fatty food resulting in us being lazy (this applies to me too because I love nasi lemak, huhu) and because we love the comfort zone that some people give us, we feel that it’s okay if we do not change because we know that they could it for us even though they do it all wrong. Corruption is so obvious and it’s bizarre that many people have just realized it.

Personally, before the day of the election, I thought that the public wouldn’t want a change, I thought that most of would just sit back and watch the destruction of the country, that we liked what’s happening to our country and I’m not taking about the price thingy. I’m talking as an overall. What I didn’t realize is that the new generation of youths [especially] are coming out (those 21 year olds and above who are first time voters and campaign smart youths) and they want change and they want to do something about everything and that they could see what most old people cannot see. Basically, this generation [hopefully] are all intelligent and smart.

These have been my observation for the recent election:

For me, the opposition won because they have always been strong and that they’re just getting stronger and stronger. On the contrary with the previous government who are deteriorating and sinking in quicksand.

The opposition made a statement that the previous government made the price go all up but I’m afraid if the opposition couldn’t reduce the price either. People vote for that reason solely because they want economical stability and what makes me worried is that, if the opposition couldn’t do it then the people who vote for this reason could strongly attack the opposition and I pray that doesn’t happened and that the opposition could at least do something even in this short period of 5 years.

I get intrigued at why some people suddenly want to vote for the opposition (not that I have anything against this, of course not). So I asked an Indian friend of mine and she said that ever since the Hindraf issue, majority of the Indians really turned their backs on MIC and that many of them loathe the politician who always increases the toll prices :p

Another reason is that, they’re just sick and tired of MIC. A friend of mine said that the previous government is corrupted and that they get all the money and don’t even bother about the poor people.

There are so many reasons but the people who are already on the opposition side have always voted for Islam and for the religion to be implemented according to the Holy Quran. It is so obvious that majority of the people who voted for the previous government are afraid that if they vote for change, they would be voting for NO Karaoke in the middle of the night, NO to rempits especially sending rempits off on a stupid flying mission, NO free access to liquor, NO couples dating freely at the park, NO this and NO that…

Huh…I know change is daunting but the question is, are we not afraid of death? And I thought this was a self-declared Islamic country then why are you not subjecting yourself to Islamic values? Why is your wife and daughter not wearing the hijab? Why are majority of the most intellectual lady ministers not wearing the hijab?

Don’t make me sick okay…

Hail to the new Shah Alam!

and Selangor for that matter, and Perak and Kedah and Kudos to Kelantan and hehe :D

Heaven Child by Beloved Sista Mar

Bismillah, Assalamualaikum :)

Inna Lillah and my deepest condolence to kak mar and her family but i know she's strong and i think this is one of the most beautiful writings ever.
kak mar is so many things, a great writer and a super fighter :)

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

HEAVEN CHILD

How should one write about the death of a loved one. How does a mother write about the baby she carried for seven months and lived for eight days.

When she remembers the way her babies kicked inside her stomach
When she remembers how she read everyday surah Luqman to them out loud
When she remembers talking to them everyday,telling them to keep on fighting
When she remembers the anticipation each time a doctor's appointment, for them to be alive and survive
When she remembers how needles are poked through her tummy so that her babies would be better
When she remembers how hard she prayed to God, so hard that she felt her heart might break
When she remembers the first time she heard her babies cry
When she remembers the first time she was able to touch them, even just through the hole of the incubator
When she remembers how baby izz took one of her fingers and wrap his whole hand around it
When she remembers how much in pain her baby was and she could do nothing
When she knows her baby is dying and the doctors cant do anything anymore
When she remembers the way baby izz looked at her and she told him, its ok to stop fighthing
When she remembers the ustadz bathing him, saying... sempurna budak ni
When she remembers her baby being buried never been cuddled by his mother

It's too hard.Remembering.Its unimaginable pain, deepest sorrows and darkest grief.
It's too hard.Living with the scars on your tummy. Feeling the presence he was.
It's too hard.Visiting baby ayyash, walking past the incubator where baby izz was.

But this mother
also remembers that she's also a mother of ayyash and maira
She also remembers her hub says that life has been so good, this is one time that God wants to challenge us with a hard test of faith, and we must not fail this test
She also remembers the love showered by family and friends
She also remembers that God loves strong muslims
She also remembers that God knows best
She also remembers that now...
she has a child waiting in heaven for his parents to come

And though her heart crumbles at times, what makes her heart smile is that heaven is indeed, the nicest place to be especially for a little brave fighter that she knew for just seven months and eight days.

you were brave dear izz and im proud of u. i will be as strong as u are.

IN MEMORY OF BABY IZZ MUHAMMAD MUNAWAR (29.2.2008 - 8.3.2008)

taken from http://www.samwan.blogspot.com

my tears flow reading this by kak mar, i felt sooo sad yet i heard that kak mar was being ever so strong, just like the kak mar i have always known and admire...

kak mar, my prayers ARE ALWAYS with you...
and like everyone else, we all know that baby Izz is waiting for his parents in heaven~

i dunno y

Bismillah, Assalamualaikum :(

i am exasperated, frustrated, depressed, sick, just sick...

and my ym is problematic, maybe there's a virus somewhere in the laptop and in my body :'(

i did say to be continued aite

Bismillah, Assalamualaikum ^_^

Za’ba English Language Campaign 2008 ended okay, just okay? I don’t know what else to say, I wish I could say superbly, but I didn’t feel that it ended the way it should be, as wonderfully magnificently as it should have been.

The one who had to officiate the opening and the closing ceremony wasn’t even the principal of my college but had to be imported from other college which gives a bad light to our college because this is an inter-college tournament but even our principal couldn’t be there, what gives?!

The sketch that my JMK made (under the guidance of my course mates because it was our sketch back in our foundation course and it was the script that I wrote), turned out to be okay, just okay again?! Well, this is because there were ‘touchy’ moments between the male and female lead. I got really angry because whenever it was practise time, we made sure that there were no such scenes and we reiterate to our fellow JMK to uphold such religious values. Then why must they defy?! Is that the sort of leadership we want to encourage? NO! The drama would still have been okay without the male and female lead (supposedly acting as husband and wife) touching! This is not Remp-it or whatever Yasmin Ahmad’s stupid movie that allows such immoral scenes to take place.

I found out that, in the Kitab Tuhfathul Ghoghiribin, page 26, the 28^th biggest sin is for an organizer to allow such programs whereby men and women act freely resulting in maksiat therefore the organizers will get most of the sins of majority of the people there.

I am not a preacher, believe me, but I would like to make a difference in myself and in others and because we have such a short life, then I would like to start now. And I could always start slowly and I could do so by gaining as much knowledge and using that knowledge for goodness.

It’s simple really, we can do anything we want but as long as we adhere to the teachings of Islam, is it not? This is also a reminder to myself, wallahualam~

why all the negativity?! i am so mad!!

Bismillah, Assalamualaikum :)

So this weekend, my college is organizing Za'ba English Language Campaign 2008 and this is an inter-college event whereby there will be competitions in the form of Jazz Chant, Poetry Recitation, General Knowledge Quiz, Scrabble, Storytelling, Sketch and Spelling Bee.

I am only the coordinator for storytelling (supposedly I was in charge of Scrabble but a friend of mine wanted that experience so I yielded) and in charge of protocol but I’m pretty enthusiastic about this campaign. This is because it’s about creating awareness in the university students that this is the many various fun ways to learn English and to instil a stigma in the university students that learning English is fun.

I was the one who gave the catch phrase for the event and that is, SMILE AND SPEAK ENGLISH *beaming*

I am really fervent about this whole event but not everyone is…

Because this is an inter-college tournament, all 5 colleges are compelled to participate in all events. So we as the JMK use our network to cooperate with all JMK’s from the 5 colleges. Even though I am not even the vice program manager of this campaign but I feel so frustrated at the way people shuddered at the thought that this is an English program. I get so annoyed at the way they respond saying that they have given up looking for participants because many are afraid or just not interested.

Additionally, there’s even a college that hasn’t send even one contestant for any events. I am so mad that I use all the connections I have in that college to practically force them to participate. I don’t even want to force them, let alone make them hate me for pushing them but I can’t just sit back and be contented that every college has sent at least one and that college (just because that college doesn’t have TESL students) hasn’t send anyone at all.

What puzzles me in all of this is the much negativity that we (the workforce) received throughout the process in making this event work. All we ask is to help us look for participants and they themselves can be contestants but no, they just want to have that perception that English intimidates people. And to say that all of us are future teachers. Urgh, I am soooo mad!!!!

To be continued…

everyone knows i don't drink coffee

These candles symbolizes the glow of 25 wonderful years of marriage <3

Bismillah, Assalamualaikum :)

it's been hectic and hectic and hectic and h_cti_. and ok, you get the picture huh..

in spite of that, i want to celebrate, nooo, not valentine (phoeey!) but:

HAPPY 25th WEDDING ANNIVERSARY TO MY BELOVED PARENTS :)

abah and mama's wedding is my inspiration and i pray and dream of something similar. i strongly believe that the secret to a blissful marriage is the foundation of both the bride and groom and that is the Islamic beliefs that the husband and wife uphold. both spouses can say that they share the same religion but do they share the same beliefs and ideologies? think about this when looking for Mr or Mrs Right ;)

It is He who strengthened you with His help and with the believers.

He has put affection between their hearts. Had you spent all that is in the earth you could not have put affection between their hearts, but Allah put affection between them; verily He is mighty, wise.

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i don't want to say i'm crumbling but sometimes i feel like i am. i do :(

it's just that being balance is sooo challenging and though sometimes i like the exhilaration but at times, i feel so exhausted!

lately, it's been waking up early (but still sleeping after subuh, TSK TSK),
sleeping late but latest at 3am,
classes and tall order assignments,
JMK programs, plus,
my program for the troubled kids -> now about this, i'm so anxious that i even dreamt about it and fakhru, you know what maklong said about those kids scrutinizing future teachers, well, i think i have nightmares about that! aaaaaa!!!!

and today is BIG NEWS because the elections are around the corner SO my program has just been postpone from 1st to 2nd March to 15th to 16th March, huhu, dunno if i should take that as a blessing in disguise or what...i feel indifferent when i got the news :-?

i can be so weird and now, i'm actually drinking coffee, everyone knows i don't drink coffee

i'm pretty nervous :-s

Bismillah, Assalamualaikum :)

today my friends and i went to survey a place where a husband and wife takes care of troubled kids, for my program. i have never dealt with troubled kids before and i'm nervous. but i really think that it's a good exposure for future teachers (esp for future teachers).

just how troubled these kids are...

1. the boys are mostly involved in drugs, some are just into glue but others have gone so far.
2. some boys were involved in theft.
3. majority of the girls have lost their virginity and have involved in a very not healthy and condemn by religion sexual activities.
4. some of the girls have given birth.
5. some kids had ran away from home.
6. family rejected some of the kids because the parents or guardians couldn't handle em anymore.

i saw only one boy during my visit today. his father came to picked him up so that he can go back to his hometown. he looked so innocent. the caregiver said that he was into sniffing glue and that's why his parents sent him there so that they still can save him. and he can be saved. i dunno y i'm saying this but i feel that he can be saved. i want him to be saved. i prayed that he will be saved. because he's young and he has a bright future ahead of him and i hope he realizes that...

that's only 1 boy that i met today. my program is for 2 days and 1 night and i'm nervous just thinking about it :-s

people have high expectations that we are future teachers but really, apart from that, we're all learning and i wanna learn and gain that experience. but i don't expect for the expectations to be lower, i just hope that we can make a difference regardless of what we do, even if it's just cooking with them. i want to get to know these kids. and last but not least;

i want, that for every speech that the future teachers make to these less privileged kids, at least ONE sentence or a phrase or a WORD, can leave a lasting impact to these kids.

that's why it's important for us to be aware of how and what comes out of our mouth :)

Those men― Allah knows what is in their hearts; so keep clear of them, but admonish them and speak to them a word to reach their very souls.
An-Nisa [4:63]

Scrabble Heads

Bismillah, Assalamualaikum :)

i am tired but i can't be tired for a long time, got lotsa stuffs to do, huhu :]
i just got back from University Malaya from attending the


it was a SCRABBLE BLAST!!! i enjoyed every minute of it in spite of losing B U T...

i did win 3 out of 5 games so Alhamdulillah :)

i have always loved Scrabble but sometimes i just don't play it as much as i like to. but when i became my university representative to the NST ASTAR Scrabble Challenge Inter-Varsity, all i could see and dream was scrabble babble, hehe ;)

and so began me playing scrabble with my teammate, evanna,
playing solitaire scrabble (playing alone),
duplicate scrabble (playing with my teammate with the same tiles and trying to achieve the highest number of words),
scrabble at night,
whenever i feel sleepy, i would refrain from sleeping and play scrabble,
taking the scrabble board game to the jmk room and playing with fellow jmk just before meetings,
and REALLY dreaming of scrabble! no joke!

yesterday i dreamt of scrabble too, of all the words i could make and scoring high with the tiles and did i tell you that i have memorized the points a tile has? like for instance, H is a 4?
and so evanna calls me a geek :-B

i learnt that in playing Scrabble, there are 3 important factors:

1. Skill (because u need the knowledge of the word power)
2. Strategy (because u can't just simply put the tiles anywhere u want)
3. Rezeki (because as a muslim, luck is not in my scrabble dictionary and Allah gives enlightment to make words as you may have the tiles but you may not make the word)

playing scrabble with other varsity was an enjoyable moment i'll never forget. so here's pictures:

the drama queen (my teammate that is :p ) and i ;D

the clique i became good friends with throughout the tournament. from left upwards; sharmilie, tanusha, anusha, aminah, evanna and i :)

the day of the tournament, surprisingly the rules were pretty lenient! and to think i had timed myself whenever i practised for 2 minutes every turn when instead, at the tournament, they let us think long and hard but below 5 mins la :>

my first game and i won! :))

my second game and i won again!

my third game and i won! [i know i look pudgy, that's P-3, U-1, D-2, G-2, Y-4 :p ]

i forgot to take pictures for my fourth game and that's probably because i went against the team that i had played in my first game but this time around, he won because as they say, once bitten, twice shy, huhu (i actually forgot the idiom, am i correct then?)

me panicking because i had lost a game :s

my last game and 2nd loss, sob, sob...

Sir Roy from Malaysian Scrabble Association, he's so cool, he just goes up to my tiles and instantly formed a word! and i was still thinking hard and long, huhu :p he says he's been playing for too long!

the closing ceremony :D

Goodbye everyone! i had soooo much fun and what an experience and i wanna enter again next year!!! :))