Heaven Child by Beloved Sista Mar

Bismillah, Assalamualaikum :)

Inna Lillah and my deepest condolence to kak mar and her family but i know she's strong and i think this is one of the most beautiful writings ever.
kak mar is so many things, a great writer and a super fighter :)

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

HEAVEN CHILD

How should one write about the death of a loved one. How does a mother write about the baby she carried for seven months and lived for eight days.

When she remembers the way her babies kicked inside her stomach
When she remembers how she read everyday surah Luqman to them out loud
When she remembers talking to them everyday,telling them to keep on fighting
When she remembers the anticipation each time a doctor's appointment, for them to be alive and survive
When she remembers how needles are poked through her tummy so that her babies would be better
When she remembers how hard she prayed to God, so hard that she felt her heart might break
When she remembers the first time she heard her babies cry
When she remembers the first time she was able to touch them, even just through the hole of the incubator
When she remembers how baby izz took one of her fingers and wrap his whole hand around it
When she remembers how much in pain her baby was and she could do nothing
When she knows her baby is dying and the doctors cant do anything anymore
When she remembers the way baby izz looked at her and she told him, its ok to stop fighthing
When she remembers the ustadz bathing him, saying... sempurna budak ni
When she remembers her baby being buried never been cuddled by his mother

It's too hard.Remembering.Its unimaginable pain, deepest sorrows and darkest grief.
It's too hard.Living with the scars on your tummy. Feeling the presence he was.
It's too hard.Visiting baby ayyash, walking past the incubator where baby izz was.

But this mother
also remembers that she's also a mother of ayyash and maira
She also remembers her hub says that life has been so good, this is one time that God wants to challenge us with a hard test of faith, and we must not fail this test
She also remembers the love showered by family and friends
She also remembers that God loves strong muslims
She also remembers that God knows best
She also remembers that now...
she has a child waiting in heaven for his parents to come

And though her heart crumbles at times, what makes her heart smile is that heaven is indeed, the nicest place to be especially for a little brave fighter that she knew for just seven months and eight days.

you were brave dear izz and im proud of u. i will be as strong as u are.

IN MEMORY OF BABY IZZ MUHAMMAD MUNAWAR (29.2.2008 - 8.3.2008)

taken from http://www.samwan.blogspot.com

my tears flow reading this by kak mar, i felt sooo sad yet i heard that kak mar was being ever so strong, just like the kak mar i have always known and admire...

kak mar, my prayers ARE ALWAYS with you...
and like everyone else, we all know that baby Izz is waiting for his parents in heaven~